What Not to Expect from Your Therapist

Its important for each patient to set reasonable expectations for therapy. Psychiatrist and behavioral health providers will expect you to know there are professional boundaries between patients and therapists. Each provider relationship is different, and should be a win-win opportunity for those involved.

1. Don't expect a miracle cure from your therapist. Your concerns may have been with you for a long time and long-established patterns can take a while to change.
2. Do not expect your therapist to be your friend outside of the therapy session. This can lead to complications with your therapy and should be avoided. You may wonder why your therapist does not acknowledge you in public. This is because your therapist wants to keep your relationship confidential. If you make the first move to say hello, then the interaction would likely be much different. Also don't expect your therapist to attend parties or other functions. Some therapists will come to significant life milestones such as a graduation or marriage, but other therapists believe that it is not appropriate. Talk to your therapist about your feelings in regard to these matters.
3. If you feel that the therapist is setting goals for you which are based on what the therapist considers is important for you to change and these goals are not your own, then be wary. At times therapists will unwittingly introduce their own unresolved issues which influence their treatment decisions. This is something to watch out for. For instance, if you mention that you are in an unhappy marriage and yet you are going to therapy to get over stage fright, and the therapist says you have to work on your marriage first, then he is a therapist to avoid. That therapist may be dealing with unresolved personal relationship issues which are influencing his or her judgment in regard to your treatment. This is rare, but it is something to be aware of.
4. Never let the therapist perform any action or ask you to do anything that is against your morals and values. If a therapist ever asks you to do something unacceptable and does not respect your wishes then leave immediately. Therapists are in a position of power and at times try and wield that power by saying "I know what is best for you". As with any profession, there is a small percentage of bad therapists who will abuse this power.
5. Remember never do anything that is against your values. A therapist should never touch you without your permission. Some therapists will put their hand on your shoulder once they know you to offer support, but if such a gesture makes you uncomfortable then tell the therapist. If he or she does not respect your wishes then leave immediately. If you ever have a particular problem or disagreement with your therapist, it is vital to bring this out in the open. Disagreements will inevitably arise, this is part of the therapy process. You should watch out for therapists who don't listen to your concerns or apologize for mistakes.
6. Any sexual approach is unprofessional for a therapist. Asking you to remove any of your clothes, or touching you in any way without your permission is unethical. Having romantic encounters or even asking to see you outside of therapy is also unethical. Be wary of therapists who try to elicit help from you for their own problems or charities or outside business interests. Therapists may bring up personal anecdotes to assist with your therapy, but the focus should not change to dealing with the therapist's problems.
7. The therapist may give you a reduced fee to help to accommodate your financial situation. When your situation improves it is customary to re-evaluate the circumstances and possibly pay the therapist's regular fee. But the therapist cannot increase his normal fees just because he believes you can afford a higher fee.

Though these situations are rare, if you believe that your therapist behaved in an unprofessional manner then discuss this behavior with the professional ethics committee of your state licensing board or contact support@1800Therapist.com right away.

Source: 1-800-Therapist
Review Date: June 26, 2010
Reviewed by: Barb Hansen BScMLT